Posts in Learning
In the firing line of life

I have a tendency to go with the flow, explore and see what life brings to me.  I used to be an over achiever. Now I might even be described as an under achiever and perhaps a bit more of an over be-er. What I mean by this is that despite all the well laid plans, strategies and structured decisions, life throws curve balls. Actually life doesn’t just throw curve balls, life shoots tennis balls out of an automatic machine until you surrender.

You know that experience, just when you had everything figured out then something happened. Well this is what I am talking about.  It is that feeling that you think (key operative word here) you know (another key operative word here), then you realize that you don’t really know.  In this context I am talking about over thinking, over analyzing, over doing a point to exhaustion - your own exhaustion.

Photo © Jenn Shallvey

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Being the authentic you
The key to being authentic is to know your self.

To know your self you have to make time to be in relationship with your self.

Being authentic implies a lot.  Firstly it implies a sense of presence. You need to be present to be.  Then there is an element of uniqueness to it. Who else can be you but you?  What makes you, you?  

Ultimately being authentic is an active evolving process, not a static destination you attain.

So in the spirit of working with you on the journey to your true self I am writing a few posts on authenticity.  This one starts with some framing and context from which I will share with you some more specific and practical ways to develop.

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Addicted to retreating

Do you fantasize about escaping from your life? Do you sometimes say “I have had enough! I just need to get away and have a break?”  Well do you? If you do how often do you actually follow through on your frustrated inspiration?

Well I do sometimes. However to assuage my guilt I usually have a purpose. To go away I have always attached some sort of reason. The most common purpose is to attend a seminar or workshop. This learning aspect serves 1) to justify the escape to all in my family and 2) to give me permission to get away. 

A close inspection of my diary over the past several years reveals the real truth. I am a learning junkie.  Ok, more than that. I am a retreat junkie. I have to get my fix or I will go crazy.  Well not literally crazy, but certainly borderline difficult to be around or live with. Hence why my family likely understands and reluctantly sends me off on my little jaunts.

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A letter to you before you are no longer physically here


Dear loved one,

I send you this letter as a gesture of spirit, from one human being to another. 

You want for nothing, for your life has meaning.  Your presence in this world every day touches those around you, brightens their day and makes a difference, no matter how big or how small. 

Do not regret any unfinished or undone business in your life.  You live life according to your way and are an example to others for honoring this path.

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It’s your dream so why would you let someone else squash it

We all have dreams. Big dreams and little dreams of a life where what we wish to achieve actually happens for real.  You might call this setting goals. I don’t.  Dreams to me are what come from the gut, the essence of who we are inside.  We have a yearning, almost an insatiable desire to satisfy such dreams.
I recently traveled to California to attend the San Francisco Writers Conference where dreams were on tap.  Every conversation opened with the phrase – “So what are you writing a book about?”  The answer would either be a laugh, a serious statement or a practice of a pitch carefully crafted after attending one of the many sessions on this topic.

Yet underneath the words of each person, I sensed the heart of a writer, felt the energy of storytellers and saw the longing of expression in the eyes.   These people were on a mission to calm the voice inside needing to be expressed.

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