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"Being Real" past issues

December 2010 Issue

Jenn Shallvey

Being Real

December 2010


I appreciate you.

I wish I could say this to you in person. I mean it too.

This is a newsletter that goes to people who choose to receive my writing. You may not know but this fact alone means so much to me.

So in the spirit of this time of year I would like to express my truest, deepest gratitude for your engagement with me in this non-verbal, indirect conversation.  As a way to say thank you please enjoy a few more words of reflection followed by a poem of sorts…

Pop the bubble before it pops you

It is that time of year again. We often hear people say, “I can’t believe another year has gone by.” Well it did. And what do we do to remind you of this fact? We wind ourselves up into a frenzy so that when we pop that cork on New Year’s Eve we are letting out more than fermented gas.  We let out a big sigh of relief and gasp the fresh air of a new year.

It's in the air

I feel it.  Do you feel it?  There is a familiar build up of pressure at this time of year that is palpable.  You can feel it in everything around us.  Whether you celebrate any of the holidays at this time of year or not, you are not able to escape the reminders and the direct experiences.  In addition to normal everyday tasks, work and commitments add in:

  • extra traffic
  • extended shopping hours
  • festive parties at work and with friends
  • last minute holiday/vacation planning
  • suitcase packing
  • travel, travel, travel
  • house decorating (maybe even extra cleaning)
  • overflow of holiday communication (sorry I know this newsletter is in that )
  • family reunions with people you want don’t want to see
  • familiar sounding year in review stories and media countdowns
  • shopping
  • baking, cooking, preparing holiday food

A question of meaning

So my question for you at this time of year is how do you have fun and at the same time engage in a meaningful and purposeful way?

I ask this question because what seems to be forgotten is the meaning behind the holiday season. It is so easy to get caught up in the superficial aspects of this time rather than go deep. We can also let the overwhelming part get to us and take the fun out of all the activities.

I want you to go deep. I also want you to have fun.  It is not an either or but an and situation.  There is a time for both if you make it.  Even in all the activities listed above there are moments to have fun and go deep.

You think I am crazy, right? How could being in traffic be a deep experience?  Well I ask you then, how can it be? It can, you just need to ask yourself what you can do to make a difference.  Or how can the office Christmas party be fun if your company is struggling and jobs are at risk?  It is up to you.  How do you find a way to still celebrate what you do have, not what you don’t?

An experiment for you

With the remaining days left of this year you can experiment. In fact you don’t even have to apply this just to this time of year. Try this out anytime, anywhere.

Pick a situation on the list that bugs you, really gets to you.  Now imagine you are in that experience. What were you thinking BEFORE the experience? How did you set yourself up for a bad experience. By this I mean to what extent did you pre-program your mind to only see the experience as negative, dreadful or bad?  Then in the experience how conscious are you of the way you feel about it? Can you step back, witness and observe your own feelings and attitude? Can you distance yourself objectively enough to then say why are you doing this?  What if you did something different and if you did what would it be?  Could you look forward a bit and ask yourself how you wish to feel going forward?  If you were to fast forward ask yourself how do you want to remember this in the future?  When you are reminiscing what kind of stories do you want to tell about this experience?

Not so positive example

For example, let’s take a common one like driving in holiday traffic to get to your holiday destination.  If you are on the negative side of the equation you talk up the traffic before you even get in the car. Then you whinge about it all the way on your trip. When you get to your destination you are exhausted, not from the drive, but from the self induced stress of hating driving in the traffic. Sounds pretty frustrating yet so common, right?

A healthier approach

This time you talk about the upcoming trip with your travelling companion. You discuss in a non emotive way how you think the traffic might be and how you usually feel when you drive in it. You then discuss strategies for how you might deal with it by planning your departure and driving approach.  Then while you are driving instead of complaining you choose other ways to entertain yourself such as music, audio books, conversation with your companion.  You even might engage in the experience as a tourist drive even if you have gone this way hundreds of time.  You choose to see the trip as a fun experience.  Then of course afterwards when someone asks about the trip you can recall the sights, the scenery and the pleasant and happy experience you had seeing it all along the way.  Yes you might have taken longer yet you accepted this would happen when you planned the trip. What you choose to recount also allows you to focus again on what worked rather than what didn’t.  

The approach is not about ignoring real emotions but changing your thinking and conscious attitude so that you are less likely to experience the negative emotions.  What I am suggesting is that you take a more conscious and heart based approach to the holiday season. This after all is what the spirit of the season is about, not how much money you spend on someone for a present.  You can give meaning to anything as this is in your own world view. Therefore all the above experiences can simply be aspects of the holiday season that help you remember what really matters.

I ask...

What does really matter to you?

Perhaps this is the time to reflect on that question. Then maybe what you go through, have happen and experience will be just that.

So enjoy popping the bubbles along the way rather than in one big bang at the end.


You will probably find this amusing, yet I get inspired in all sorts of ways. I recently attended the U2 concert in Sydney. I am a huge fan going back to the early days as a high school kid in the early '80s.  So though I have attended my fair share of concerts this was the first one that really hit me. Perhaps it's my middle age. Perhaps it's my perception of what is happening in the world right now. Perhaps it's just that I listened just as much as I danced and sang that night. I heard a message, a powerful message. It was summed up in one question from Bono, "What time is it now?"  So following from that night of muscially induced inspiration I wrote these words for me as if I was looking in the mirror. I then saw that I could say them to you as well. I share them with you first.  If you are inspired by the words feel free to share with others (just acknowledge my authorship thank you).

The time is now

I close my eyes, and I make a wish.

I wish for the world to be a better place.

I feel this wish in my heart. I feel it in my soul.

There is no turning back, only going forward.

I want to go forward.

I want to see the world anew, afresh, alive.

Is it possible?

Is it?

Are you ready? Can you step up?

I say so.

For it is time. The time is now to step up.

It is not just time for others but time for you.

Time for you to take responsibility.

Time for you to care.

Time for you to do your part.

To make this a better world for all.

Please enjoy the audio of the feature article.


Real Intuition Starter interviews

I have interviewed two more fantastic people for this project. Due to many reasons I have yet to upload the interviews. I will be doing so in the new year. So look forward to these in January 2011.  

If you feel you are ready to share and believe your story can help others then contact me to be next. I will interview you anywhere in the world via phone or Internet.

To get more information on the project please visit theIntuition Starter website interview page

Facebook page is happening

I am having so much fun updating my Facebook page. Every day I get up I post a reflective comment of sorts. Every day I take a photo and then share this as well. I truly love sharing inspiring thoughts and images with people.  

My purpose for this page is simple. I share with you the words that I now have on the page when people visit for the first time:

My intention here is to inspire you to connect

to your true, authentic self through reflective

words, images and conversation.

My wish is for you to gain clarity, internal

wisdom and insight.

As you open so does your heart.

As your heart opens the real you emerges.

As you remember the real you, step out

confidently and make a positive difference in

your world of influence.

It's time for you to be real.

Jenn Shallvey

Promote Your Page Too

Virtual coaching

I offer coaching via the internet and phone. If you are looking for some support but not able to visit me in person then please contact me to learn more about what options are available.

Soon there will be a page on the website with more information about this service.

Please feel free tocontact memore to discuss or explore further online.

New workshops for 2011

There are new workshops including Intuition Starter planned for 2011. More information will be coming in January.  If you have specific interests or requests you are always welcome to send your suggestions to me.

Meaningful Meetings

The last session of the year was appropriately titled 'Giving and Receiving Cycle'.  We enjoyed the evening with a bit of a festive theme including decorations and gifts.  Everyone expressed how important it was to take time out for self care by going to the Meaningful Meetings.

Because these sessions work and I really enjoy running them they will be on offer again next year. The dates will still be Wednesday in the third week of the month.

The first meeting of the new year will be 19 January 2011, topic yet to be announced.

For more information please check out the flyer

Blog updates

Jenn’s main blog

I am pleased that my sudden new found audio recording skills means I am now recording main blog posts in audio as well as writing.  You can now subscribe to this blog via iTunes to get audio in addition to RSS/email via the website. 

Jenn Shallvey Main Blog


Please enjoy daily inspiration with questions and statements that inspire you to reflect, go within and access your own inner wisdom.


Enjoy the combination of original photography combined with inspiring reflections. The power of visual added to the words gives you an extra dose of reflection time.  All photos are by Jenn Shallvey.

Please forward and share with friends

It is my intention to inspire and motivate people through my writing to be real, authentic and true to self.  I also send this newsletter to people who opt in only.  If you know someone who might enjoy reading and connecting please pass this on and share. It means a lot to me to make a difference in this way.

It would mean alot to me if you feel like sharing this newsletter that you do share it.  It's easy to do so by clicking on the button at the bottom of this email and 'forward to a friend'.


I truly appreciate our connection and your interest in my work. I hope that I am able to help you with what I have on offer and share.  Please feel free to connect in whatever way suits you. I look forward to hearing from you.



All writing in this newsletter is copyright Jenn Shallvey 2010.


Real Intuition Starter Interviews

Facebook page is happening

Virtual coaching

New workshops in 2011

Meaningful Meetings

Blog updates

To find out more please visit my website


What meaning do you find in your personal holiday traditions?

How do you see the fun in what can be challenging and frustrating during busier times in the year?

When is it ok to say no?

What are you prepared to stand up for now? 

This is the time for you to do what you came her to do.

Step up.

Start now.

What's on soon...

You can now visit the online calendar to see what events and workshops are coming up.